Things I Thought Mattered in 100 Level… That Really Didn’t

 In 100 level, everything feels like a big deal.

Every smile from a classmate. Every stare in the lecture hall. Every GPA point. Every outfit. You step into campus like someone stepping into a stage — and it feels like everyone’s watching.

I remember trying so hard to figure it all out. And now, a few years later, I look back with something between a laugh and a little tenderness.

Because the things I once stressed about?
Most of them didn’t matter as much as I thought they did.

Here are a few.

1. Wearing My “Best” to Every Class

There was a time I treated lecture halls like fashion runways. Polished sneakers. Freshly ironed jeans. Perfume I couldn't pronounce.

I remember one Tuesday morning — 6:45am — power was out, and I still ironed my clothes with a stove-heated iron. For a lecture where the lecturer didn’t even show up.

These days? Clean shirt, comfy trousers, and good sandals. That’s peace.

2. Having the “Perfect” Timetable

I made schedules like I was managing a tech startup. No 8am classes, long lunch breaks, no double courses back to back.

By week 3, everything had changed. Lecturers swapped times. Labs appeared out of nowhere. And somehow, I was still late to class.

3. Sitting in the Front Row to “Show I’m Serious”

First semester, I thought front row meant excellence. Eyes locked on the board. Pen always moving.

But sometimes, I wasn’t even following the lecture — just trying to look focused.

Eventually, I sat mid-row and even back row sometimes. I learned better when I stopped performing.

4. Being “Close” to Everyone

I wanted to be liked. Friendly with every name I saved. Respond to every “hi.” Be the one who remembered birthdays and followed up with “how was the test?”

But being close to everyone meant being close to no one.

I’ve come to value small, honest circles. People who understand silence, not just banter.

5. Doing Group Work Alone to “Prove Myself”

There were times I did all the group work because I thought it meant I was smart. Or dependable.

Truth? I was just tired and bitter by the end of it. These days, I speak up. We divide the work. We learn together.

6. Having the Latest Phone or Gadget

Once, I skipped meals just to buy a new phone. Not because I needed it — but because I wanted to blend in. Everyone around me was upgrading, and I felt stuck.

Now? I care more about battery life and hotspot strength.

7. Thinking My 100-Level GPA Would Define My Life

When that first-semester GPA dropped, I felt it in my soul. Like I had failed not just the exam — but life.

Now I know better. It mattered, sure — but it didn’t decide my journey. I’ve reshaped my story again and again.

Now I Know…

I don’t mock the version of me that cared so much.
That person was doing their best.

But I’ve learned that peace tastes better than perfection. That growth isn’t always loud or visible. Sometimes, it’s just how you carry yourself differently through the same hallway.

So if you’re in 100 level — or feel like it in life — breathe.
Some of the things that feel huge right now… will shrink with time.

And one day, like me, you’ll look back and laugh. Softly. Kindly.

Because you’ve grown.

 

“Growth is loud in hindsight, but quiet while it’s happening.”